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Genre: Third-Person Action Publisher: SEGA Developer: Platinum Games Players: 1

By Keith B (10th Jan 2010)

So Bayonetta has finally arrived, after months and months of anticipated groaning from the mainstream gaming press. Rarely has a game raised under-collar temperatures so much, and fans of skintight black suits and lollipops will be thrilled.

The basic story is this: you play as Bayonetta, a witch that has been in a forced sleep for 500 years, and during this time the rest of the Umbra Witches have been destroyed, hunted down by the agents of Paradiso, or Heaven. She’s awoken without her memory, and must wage a war against Heaven to find out what’s happened and get her memories back. As with many games in this genre, the story can tend to get a little convoluted at times, but as a method for keeping the player interested, it really works. I enjoyed this tale far more than those of its peers – Ninja Gaiden and Devil May Cry – although it still retains a certain blurriness.

There is a massive, massive attempt here to be the Sexiest Game Ever Made, and unsurprisingly, Platinum Games manage to pull it off because Bayonetta is the sexiest main character that I’ve ever played. There are so many shots of breasts and ass that it becomes the norm very quickly, and whether or not you’ll find the repeated exposure of the six square inches of area between her thighs sexy or strangely exploitive (I’m aware that it’s a video game) will be up to you. The blatant objectifying of the characters thins out the further you play, again, whether that’s good or bad will depend on whether you get your kicks from looking at an animation over a living, breathing woman. As a main character though, she will certainly remain in the mind after the game is completed, even if it is because of an almost childish infatuation with the female form.

The big thing here, aside from the sexy-time, is the combat, and it is, in a word, awesome. Stringing together combos where not only can you reach 99 hits in a matter of moments, but you can do so with each limb in a blur of guns, swords, and special attacks, is instantly rewarding. The loading screen is your playground, showing you the waves of moves you can do and allowing you to practice between slicing Heaven’s agents to pieces.



Boiling it down and it’s a rather simple affair, with the four face buttons handling punches and kicks, firing guns, and jumping. The RT activates a dodge mechanism, perhaps the most useful button you have. Achieve a perfect dodge and Witch Time kicks in, where enemies slow down briefly, allowing multiple attacks to be unleashed.

As Bayonetta is a witch, she also has access to a range of special attacks, which grow so large towards the end of the game that they become mind-boggling. Her hair is her clothing, and her weapon, for from her hair comes these demented giants of beasts, normally as a finishing move for a boss, but she can instigate smaller attacks throughout the game that provide a microsecond of a break from the frenetic combat.

Foes, for the most part, and really well done if limited in scope. The angelic forms of the enemies (you collect the halos for cash, to spend at The Gates of Hell, or a shop to use layman terms) are impressive, and the boss battles are on a massive scale. The locations are often brilliant, sometimes breathtaking, offering a sense of greatness that is rarely reached and allowing the player to feel incredibly powerful for most of the time.



As is expected with these titles, repetition becomes an issue. Thankfully you don’t have to retread the same locations over and over searching for keys/skulls/whatever, but you do face the same enemies again and again. Considering the locations are some the best in a game yet, both visually and in terms of design, I don’t think revisiting them would be quite as painful as the corridors or dungeons of other games like this. Boss fights are another matter. Killing a boss at the end of stage three (for example), then killing two of them on stage seven, then three of them on stage 12 gets boring quick. Throw in the fact that many of the bosses can be defeated almost effortlessly by simply avoiding their blows while standing back firing pistols in their faces and much of the charm is lost.

Similarly, having lollipops (constantly sticking something in her mouth you see) as potions is both good and bad. Good because they give you a boost when needed, but bad because the system to create them is so shallow, with only three components available. Limiting players to carrying one major potion of each type (which restores about 60% of health or magic, or provides temporary power boost or a shield) is rather weak, just like the rest of the potions available which give maybe 20% of your designated stat back and are themselves limited to three at a time.



The game’s maximum difficulty when you first begin is Normal, with Hard unlocked after a playthrough and Non Stop Climax unlocked after completion on Hard. Multiple playthroughs are encouraged and expected, and with the massive appeal of the relentless combat replays are almost guaranteed, aided by the scoring system for each chapter. Clocking in at around 15 hours of game time on Normal, Bayonetta offers length of play and appeal that I’ve never felt from similar games. It actually felt too long, a criticism I don’t often get to raise with games but one that rings true here.

If you’re a fan of Sega history then you’re also going to have a field day, because there are plenty of subtle references to the company’s rich history, often twisted up with a sense of enormity that sucks the player into the game world without effort. The nod to Space Harrier is paired with Bayonetta riding a massive missile through the air while blasting waves of foes, while Road Rash is remembered while she’s racing on a highway on a motorbike at what feels like 250mph. The bonus stage at the end of each level, while ultimately useless and something that never evolves from start to finish, brings memories of firing shurikens at the jumping ninjas in the bonus stage of Shinobi, all of which conjured warm memories of a wasted childhood in a video arcade.



Despite the all out action, and the continual references to the Sega back catalogue, it’s important to point out that Bayonetta never takes itself too seriously. There are plenty of comic moments throughout, with witty and sharp dialogue delivered from the main character in a clipped UK schoolteacher accent.

It’s easy to overlook the flaws, the occasional slowdown when there’s a lot going on, and even the often-cluttered nature of the combat, because there are so many good things to pay attention to. If you strip away the sexiness and look at the core play, it’s still not perfect. Having it a little shorter and not repeating the enemies so much would be a start. Still, it’s hard not to recommend because there is just so much here for the player to do and doing it all is awesome.

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